Thursday, May 8, 2014

It's starting
No not Spring
The slipping
Bring your own
Copper cup
I'll fill it up
Spend my money
Empty the vessel
Trip on a stone
See the sights
Wish I was home

Thursday, April 17, 2014

Ten Thousand Flowers in Spring

The bee cannot find the hive
No honey to make
Just a stinger in the behind
Blood moon rising
Fool’s lips try to bind
Fail to trouble
The invincible season
The mindful mind

Friday, February 28, 2014

Right Now

Send money to the lemmings so they stop pulling their chutes
There’s a new book on Burroughs we must buy
Dry as dry as can be cured by cracking beeswax
This color feels good when I paint a splotch
Top of the John Hancock for carrot cake to celebrate
I don’t want to be late but early doesn’t sound good either
Perhaps I should be on time
One moment
at
a
time

Tuesday, February 18, 2014

Irruption

It’s all because of the letter V
I wonder how we're going to save the world
Taking money out of the Pig
My heart and mind are two children
Venom slows me down
Ravens are lost in Duluth
Cold as an owl irruption
I forgot the age of unforgettable
I save all of your sunsets
She loves to study the Black Death
Mining indigo with Greeks
Bones break like glass

Tuesday, February 4, 2014

Out of Nowhere

A dusty forgotten book found on how to rescue a relationship
That can’t be rescued and would it have been?
A dead man with a needle in his arm sitting on a toilet
A waste of a perfectly good life, we get one
A terminally ill girl who went to prom with her boyfriend and town
I never went to prom, but I’m alive

Wednesday, January 29, 2014

Invasion

British Suri is decidedly daft
I said call Rich's cell
Not stock price of Dell
A ketchup bottle thrown
Across the kitchen
Has high impact on naughty
Fodder for the wee gee
And gossip mill
Keep your pills
They make us slow
Pretty little policeman
Sit in the snow
Don't forget to write
About surfing with Kelly
And flying at night

Thursday, January 2, 2014

Winter Bones

There is distraction in my mind
To be in a moment
Different than the one I'm in
To fast forward to the life
I desire and deserve
Yes I deserve to be happy!
My soft heart has taken a beating
Pun not intended but serves
I've earned my stripes and badges
I've honored everyone else
Sacrificed skin and bone
And yet the snow falls

Saturday, December 14, 2013

Needs More Cowbell

I talked to a friend of mine who has cancer and a multitude of other diseases, yet she lives life to the fullest. She took me to a trapeze class. She got a cowbell clang for her efforts, I was lucky to climb the ladder, swing and land on the net.

She told me, "Stand in your truth." If you think about it, it's harder than it may seem (at least for me). Everything about you is your truth. Of course, the journey involves finding out who you are and then accepting yourself. For exactly who you are. And then there's the part about other people accepting your truth! It's too much! Yet I must try.

My friend is losing her job in June and she's going to travel the Australian countryside in a van for awhile.

I've decided to tell myself, "Stand in your truth. It'll be alright. Someday."

More cowbell!!

Thursday, December 12, 2013

Fire


I’ve been thinking a lot about fire lately.  I’d like to sit by a warm fire, I feel like I’m in hell, burning ring of fire (hello Johnny & June). But mostly I think this…

I do not fear walking through fire with you.  I fear not being with you.

Tuesday, December 10, 2013

Art

My life is shaping
Every minute now
Pricked by the sharpest pin
Burned by ambivalence
Starved by the fishermen
Carved in the softest pine
I am a sculpture
Of rings

Tuesday, November 12, 2013

The Blessing

Storms crush my footprints
I wasn’t there long enough
For them to last
Too bad the Irish priest
Can’t tell me what to do
Where to be
Who to be
How to be
He’d give me the blessing
God I need it

May the road rise to meet you,
May the wind be always at your back,
May the sun shine warm upon your face,
The rains fall soft upon your fields and,
Until we meet again,
May God hold you in the palm of His hand.

Tuesday, October 29, 2013

Lists

I think my idea of funny has changed over the past year since my husband passed away. And I like to post things that are slightly amusing (to me if no one else). Am I still funny and witty? A lot of ideas about things have changed over the past year. It seems like I’ve had a re-boot of my life. I’m starting over in many ways. There are pros and cons to that. I always marvel at people who have lists and accomplish so much crossing off things from the lists. Done! Got it! Fixed it! The most I’ve been able to piece together and look at consistently is a list of groceries that we need or a rather short to do list (Post office, Target, Bank). I thought I might try to write some of my accomplishments down for the heck of it. We’re almost to the end of the year (crazy!) so why not?

Outside
• Understand more about levers and buttons on tractor

• Know how to hook up and use tractor sprayer attachment

• Know how to fix and winterize sprayer attachment

• Know how to spray the field with herbicides at 6 mph and decide that it’s time for a sports bra

• Starting to understand multiple uses for tools other than fixing jewelry

• Proud of my toolbox

• Learned how to use a drill

• Learned how to use a weed whacker and have respect for people that can use it for more than 15 minutes without having their arms shake

• Have better understanding of how to mow fields so I don’t cut grass, just tops of weeds so horses have more to eat and I don’t have to start feeding hay in September vs. November

• Know what Navicular disease is thanks to vet who thought one of my horses might have it but turns out he’s just being old and lazy

• Made great decision to pay someone to cut the lawn

• Know more about electric fencing, how to test it and how to check if it’s working vs. call electrician and feel like dumb blonde

• Realize I have a vapor light out and might have to get on a tall ladder to change

• Realized I’m a fairly good shot with a bow and arrow

• Learned how to use ratchet straps to move furniture in truck and how not to panic when one piece falls out of truck

Inside
• Know what a burnt out florescent light bulb smells like and that it just needs to be changed (thank you to electrician for being so kind)

• Know more about decorating and staging a room

• Know more about what’s in the laundry room cupboards but still a bit perplexed on some items – i.e. why do we have soap from Germany?

• Know how to open salt bags and put in softener

• Realize adults own a lot of coats

• A funeral can cost as much as a wedding

• How to pick out headstones and memorial plaques

• Would like to warn everyone to have a porn buddy that takes care of that when you die so your wife doesn’t find it

• Able to balance accounts in Quicken

• Realize I have too much crap – i.e. time to get rid of the mix tapes

• Understand the generosity of people

• Know what crazy looks like

• Understand grace

• Know that God is with me and never leaves my side

• Starting to understand what it’s like to put myself first on occasion

• Making my own decisions, some of them good!

• Know I’m not alone

• Able to ask for help

• Understand that one of the reasons I’m on the planet is to write (yeah to a couple of published poems!)

• I’m much better writing poems than reading them to a group but the after poetry reading party is fun

• Reaffirmed how much I love the ocean

• Know how lucky I am to kiss my kids good night

Friday, August 24, 2012

What's in a Name?

I had a recent conversation about a man in his 50’s who was well-respected and had a decent career in the medical field that changed his name from Jeffrey to Will. I don’t know if he went through legal channels or made it official, but even if it’s his middle name, why make the switch now? I cynically thought it was because he would like to make sure he’s in his partner’s will (he’s in his 80’s). A leap? Perhaps. I just don’t know what would possess someone to make that change when there wasn’t something like a divorce, move into the witness protection program or new CD coming out with the new moniker. It confuses everyone and they end up having bane conversations like this and wasting moments they’ll simply never get back.
”Well, Will said that he thought the cabernet we had last week at Deb and Al’s party was “too young”, what do you think?”

“Do you mean Jeffrey?”

“Oh yes, sorry, Jeffrey who now goes by Will.”

“When did that happen?”

“I don’t know, I guess I found out at Petra’s wedding in June when I introduced him to Jeanne and Bob. He told them to call him Will.”

“Really? Why would he do that?”

“I don’t know, hon. You know, people just decide to make changes because they can.”

“Well, I think it’s confusing and weird. He’s too old to change his name and have people remember it.”

“Think away, it Will not change. Ha, get it?”

“Oh you’re funny today. Take that show on the road. She’s here all week folks, don’t forget to tip your waitress!”

“Well, I thought the cab was fine and wish I would have written down the name of it.”

“Why not give Jeffrey a call?”

“You mean Will?"

“Oh man, yeah I mean Will. Ha. Life is a trip.”

Having said this, I had someone ask me what I’d like to be called if I could change my name and I chose another – it was kind of fun to think of your own name, like re-discovering yourself. Some prefer pen names other than their own, but I think that authors should use their given names and get the respect they deserve. Michael Crichton, love that guy and wish he hadn’t passed away, used the pen name Jon Lange when he was first writing books and being published. Why Jon Lange vs. Michael Crichton? It’s not like he was writing romance books or erotica that he might be shy to claim, it was mainstream novels.

For all those potential authors, my opinion is that you should own your name because it is who you are and if the world is to share in reading your works, we want to know the person who we think fondly of, can relate to in some small way in this short life we have to live.

Tuesday, August 2, 2011

What's Your Passion? Find it!

I've had a big revelation in my wee little life this past year.  Find your passion and the world will change for you!  There is no guarantee that all of the changes will be welcomed in all facets of your life, but overall, the universe will smile upon you.  And who doesn't want that?!  I realized that my passion in life is writing.  I need to write, it's an integral part of who I am and helps make me a complete person. I am able to love more, understand more, see more, hear more.  It's tough to explain, but if you've found your passion, it's like you get it, you're awake - you were given the key, the de-coder ring and it is a load off! 

I read "The Alchemist" for book club - it's a good "find your passion" primer.  I am quite sure there is a section in most book stores devoted to finding yourself, but I don't know if it's as hard as we make it out to be.  The reason I say that is I was recently in a tiny bookstore in Colorado.  As I was browsing for books on Colorado in the nooks and crannies of the store when I heard a young excited voice of a 12 year old boy. "I am obsessed with making chicken wings and buffalo chicken wings and I'm wondering if you have any cookbooks that have any recipes?"  I was instantly amazed! I could not believe what I was hearing!  Chicken wings? I turned to a fellow browser and said,"Did you hear that?" I repeated what he said and the man and I agreed that this is the type of person to own a restaurant one day.  I said,"You can't write this stuff!"  Maybe someone can, but it's spontaneous life at its finest.  I was still trying to get over this and a man that was buried in the stacks next to me that had overheard our conversation said glumly,"I have to live with it everyday." I told him that this was so great - his son had already found his passion in life!  It's a gift! He said that his son cooks for them all of the time and they hope that he owns a restaurant some day.  The bummer of it was that he wasn't excited about this metamorphosis in his son.  He was embarrassed.  I thought it was the coolest thing I'd heard all day!  Yeah, I get that it's geeky to tell someone that you're obsessed with chicken wings.  But the bigger picture spells happiness and success.

My hope for everyone is that they find their passion, follow it, never forget it.  And for those with young children, help them find it.  It's a beautiful journey no matter the bumps in the road.

Monday, June 6, 2011

My Missing Friend - 6/1/11

I walked outside barefoot
Under the pink and blue sunset
To listen for my oriole

Arms crossed to ward off
A cold night that didn't exist
I tried to hear his melody

Only imitators and purple finches
Dined as if they were owed the oranges
I had reserved for my annual friend

No one can replace his persimmon coat
The song that makes music a need
And defines a hope for summer