Carried Away

My family and I decided nothing spells Summer like a visit to the County Fair to see the Demolition Derby. We first made our way to the animal tents. I'm always concerned that someone is going to have an allergy attack given the festival of dust, hay, hair, and who knows what else. But it went well and we saw cows, pigs, rabbits (warning: do not stick your fingers in the cages), chickens, ducks - you get the picture. A couple of " Awwww " moments and it was time to catch a bite to eat. We stopped at the 4H food tent to take part in the Wisconsin tradition of either a brat or grilled cheese. A happy helping of cholesterol was had by all. Next stop, Demolition Derby starting at 1 p.m. It was a beautiful August day, warm sun, especially with the vast amounts of concrete present at the grandstands. I felt like an ant under a magnifying glass. (Note to self - pack water bottles for almost every event.) The kids were melting and this was complicated by the fact that we couldn&

* Name has been changed to protect the not-so-innocent We went to my parents’ house for the weekend of the 4th of July. There was a reunion of sorts that took place on Saturday. It’s cousins from my dad’s side and then just random other people that know the cousins. Most of the 30 people that attended were retired (or at least that age bracket). Besides my mom coming down with a nasty bladder infection (TMI alert!), things went quite well. The weather cooperated and everyone had a good time. Including Bob the Felon. My mom let us know in the morning that cousin Nancy was bringing her son, Bob the Felon. I love it that he has a title, as it were. The only thing is, I’m not sure he knows. I asked how he became a felon and I was told it had to do with a switchblade and drugs. Ooooooo. Oh, and he’s never held a job in his life. Which blows my mind. How could you go through life (he’s in his 40’s) and not have a job?? Maybe it’s all part of his persona, his legendary status. Nanc

Required knowledge before reading: A basic understanding of Bill Murray's character in "Caddyshack". We've had our share of critters on the ranch. First it was the ground squirrels (I call them chipmunks) that dig holes in our yard. My husband flushed them out (literally) with water and a shotgun. We got lucky with a couple of skunks in that they didn't spray before their lives ended. Especially since my daughter was at my husband's side when this took place. The latest Critter War is against the woodchucks. Last weekend we went for a drive by of an Ostrich farm not far from our house. An unfortunate (female) woodchuck ran in front of our car. After we viewed the ostriches, we headed back to view the fallen. Picture the kids cranked out the window exclaiming how big her teeth are and my hubby noticing that it's a female because it has tits (he grew up on a farm). Just think, we could've had woodchuck stew that night! We have had a couple of sight

I went to a lovely wedding this weekend. Great ceremony – very touching. I wish you could’ve heard the voice track in my head – “Isn’t that sweet, honey? You see how much they love and respect each other? See how he loves her for her and they are best when they’re together? See, love is patient AND kind! Huh, huh, huh???” I do have a loving husband, don’t get me wrong, but there’s always room for improvement (on both sides). We went to the dinner and dance – again, lovely, fun. The meal was French (I believe) and actually had some words on the printed out menu card that I could not pronounce, nor knew exactly what they meant even after getting the food. The cake was to die for and I knew precisely what was in that! At the dance I finally had the chance to redeem myself. When “Dancing Queen” came on, I marched out and got through it without injury. This was important to me. It seemed the last couple of weddings I’d attended had unintended drama and I was not about to have the same t